Blackpool 2 - Wolves 1

Strictly Come Dancing, the Prince and Santa

Points Awards

• Losing Team (1 each): M. Mancienne, M. Hahnemann, C. Berra, G. Elokobi, K. Foley, R. Stearman, K. Henry, S. Hunt, M. Jarvis, D. Jones, N. Milijaš, K. Doyle, S. Ebanks-Blake, and S. Fletcher
• Yellow Card (1): C. Berra
• Yellow Card (1): K. Henry
• Disappointing player (3): S. Hunt
• Miss by mile (1): K. Doyle
• Assist (1): I. Evatt
• Assist (1): K. Doyle
• Assist (1): M. Jarvis
• Assist (1): R. Stearman
• Assist (1): M. Hahnemann
• Assist (1): M. Hahnemann

By Alan Wigley
In town this weekend we had the delights of Strictly come Dancing, Prince William on a stag weekend, and Wolves making Fantasy F**kwit fans feel like Christmas had come early with Santa delivering a hatfull of points.

First let’s talk about the Prince. As everyone knows, he’s an eager football follower (insert your own ‘Why does he support Villa then?’ gag here). No surprise, then, that on a stag weekend with his RAF colleagues, the festivities included attending the Blackpool-Wolves game. Clearly aware of Wolves’ performance in their last two matches, he made sure he was in his seat well in time for kick off – and he must have been disappointed that he had to wait a full 150 seconds for Wolves to concede their first goal. A speculative rising shot into the top corner of the net, it left Marcus Hahnemann helpless and earned him one point for an assist. More significantly, the incident resulted in the unfortunate keeper becoming a nervous wreck for the rest of the game.

With Ann Widdicombe appearing in Strictly come Dancing just down the road dressed in a fetching yellow outfit, many felt she’d have done a better job turning out for Wolves in place of the hapless Steven Hunt. Time after time the Blackpool players waltzed past him – and when he came to line up in the Wolves wall, it looked like he was about to start the Hokey Cokey. Certainly, his quick step continues to be missing in action and he again picked up three points for the most disappointing player. And he had some fierce competition, not least from Kevin Foley. Playing one of his worst games for some time, Foley switched positions with Michael Mancienne after only 15 minutes and was substituted for Nenad Milijas on the half hour.

Wolves did their best to hit back, with George Elokobi claiming handball after his shot clearly hit Stephen Crainey in the chest, before an unmarked Kevin Doyle glanced wide from Elokobi’s cross, earning him another f**kwit point. But it was to no avail. Blackpool scored their second goal just one minute before the half time whistle, when a David Vaughan corner was prodded home by Marlon Harewood off Richard Stearman, following a poor clearance from Hahnemann. With Kevin Doyle and Matt Jarvis failing in their desperate attempts to clear on the line, all four Wolves players earned a f**kwit point for an assist.

If only Wolves could kick off three minutes later and finished each half three minutes earlier they’d be top of the league.

Doyle finally got Wolves back into it in the 86th minute. With Ian Evatt off the field following treatment, Elokobi found space on the left and whipped a cross into the danger area. Evatt, who had been closely marking Doyle throughout the game, was seen sprinting back on to the pitch, suggesting his injury might not have been as bad as it first appeared – and he picks up a slightly harsh f**kwit point for an involuntary assist.